Parenting: The Foundation for Being Celebrated
Previously I wrote a blog on why it is important to surround yourself with people who celebrate you versus tolerate you. I want to do a little bit of a deeper dive to encourage parents to truly celebrate their children and especially when they are different than you.
Being celebrated should start at home for children.
As parents, it is critical to that we separate acceptance for our children as they are (good, bad, and ugly) from the disappointing behaviors that they display as they are developing into mature individuals. A child should never have to question their parents love for them, whether they belong and fit, or that they are worthy of love because the child is different and/or challenging.
Relationships with our children should be created equally.
By that, I mean that it might be easier to relate to one child over the other for a variety of reasons. Perhaps there are personality differences, opposite preferences for interaction, introversion/extroversion. etc. Therefore, it is utterly important that we, as parents, are consistent in our interaction with our children realizing that we are laying a foundation and expectation for our children to be celebrated or tolerated. It is not about being the perfect parent. Rather, it is about ensuring that our children know that they belong, creating a safe and healthy place for them to thrive, and owning when we have fallen short as parents.
Parenting is a very powerful and stressful employment. Some of us were in the position before we were fully developed as an adult. Some of us were victims of abuse and neglect as children. Regardless of how we came into the employment of parenting, it is the most rewarding employment opportunity available. Likely, you did not get it right many times in this position. No worries, none of us have. Own your mistakes-sincerely and truly when they happen; OWN THEM! Own your mistakes without making it more palatable for you, but for your child(ren) to be free from the bondage of your mistakes. Forgive yourself! Don’t blame others for your mistakes as a parent. Quite possibly, you teach your kids not to blame; neither should you.
Recognize that there are consequences for the unintended mistakes as a parent and have the patience with your child(ren) to go through the process.
Understand that transparency, honesty, and forgiveness make for much healthier relationships with your child(ren).
As a parent, you have been blessed to influence the life of an individual(s). That part! That part right there is overwhelming in and of itself. You are a wonderful being and have the opportunity to ensure that another has a foundation of being celebrated! We can help you with recognizing the different temperaments of your child(ren) and provide you with strategies to improve the relationship with your child(ren) and others in your life. Know better! Do better!